I see you Mama

Mama, I see you. Weary from sleepless nights with a colicky baby. I see you hanging on by a thread from arguing with a hard headed toddler for the 4th hour in a row. I see your long stretch of loneliness when you feel trapped by nap time for years on end.

       I see you mama the first time that big kid comes home from school in tears because of a situation you have no control over and you feel helpless. I see you when you want to stop the earth from turning to keep your baby from being in pain.

     I see you feeling lost in your new identity as  “just a mom”.  I am with you  learning to love and accept the body that created the little miracle that is now making us  pull our hair out. I am with you when your 12 year old let’s you know that you are dumb, cringy, and out of touch.

      Just know those moments are passing, they all are. Then there the moments that go by so fast and you just want them to last a little longer. I see your heart grow Mama when that soon to be young man asks for advice. I feel your pride when he includes you. I feel the warm glow you feel when they flash you a smile. I love the big moments too, winning medals, defeating the home town rivals on the football field. Days like today are my all time favorite. A workout or when they share a song they love.

       The good times and moments make it so worth all the tears. It’s here Mama. All the hard days and long nights fade in your memory. Hold these moments. Take pics. Flood your feed, don’t worry about it being annoying. You’ll need these to pop up on your memories, I know I do. Today was a workout, simple as that. Some sweat and smiles with a young man that I’m getting to know as he gets to know himself. A smile, a fist bump and my heart is full. For one hour it was just my baby and me. He was mine again for just a moment.

     I see you Mama. Learning to let go. I’m here with you in the beautiful pain of them growing up too fast. My heart aches with yours as they head towards their future and we worry together about being left in the past.  I see you Mama, smiling with tears in your eyes because they don’t need you like they used to.  Keep as many of these moments tucked away as you can Mama, it goes so fast.